The News Tribune recently came out with “five pieces of advice for those who have filed to run for election this year.” Given a new poll revealing Jay Inslee’s tenure as governor is on shaky ground, we decided to follow the TNT’s lead and take the opportunity to offer our green governor five pieces of advice for this election. Without further ado:
1. Whenever possible, reveal how your extreme positions align with President Obama’s failed administration — like the time you both, without any evidence, blamed global warming for wildfires in Washington State. An excellent opportunity to do just that is during President Obama’s fundraising dinner in Seattle on June 24th.
2. Keep revealing the full extent of your desperation by sending out uncreative fundraising appeals that cover all of your favorite liberals’ go-to attacks, including the “big, bad Koch brothers are coming to get me.” That way you can reveal your incredible hypocrisy when you accept your own bucket of dark money from California billionaire Tom Steyer.
3. Make sure that everyone knows about your unwavering support of special interests that give your campaign big money. Your secret negotiations with state employee union executives is a perfect opportunity to demonstrate your quid pro quo relationship with special interests — people will get to see how you like to spend their money to get campaign contributions.
4. Taking credit for Republicans’ accomplishments seems to be a good approach — especially considering the fact that you have no accomplishments of your own to claim. After all, it’s something you already did when you attempted to take credit for boosts in public education funding. Maybe — just maybe — people will believe you and you’ll have something to boast about.
5. Keep demonstrating how you are likely the laziest governor in the history of Washington State by — week after week — working less than 15 hours (and that’s being generous) on actually governing the state. Perhaps people may decide that you not working is actually good for our state.
He needs to roll out a new “75 point plan”. The last one dropped 74 points on election night.
6. Run against the party whose strongest state-wide candidates over the past twenty years have been:
(a) a Bible-banging bigot whose own neighbors had already voted her out of office;
(b) a right-wing extremist whose own neighbors had almost voted her out of office;
(c) a real-estate scam artist;
(d) a sleazy wanna-be corrupt political insider;
(e) a real-estate scam artist;
(f) a real-estate scam artist;
(g) a right-wing nobody who buys re-election with shameless pork-dealing
(h) an Attorney General who was such an obvious failure, he was lectured by his own state’s Supreme Court on the legal and constitutional requirements of his job.
Nothing in life is ever certain, but Governor Inslee sure has chosen his opponents very, very wisely.
Tensie–what have you been smoking? This idiot Inslee is a disgrace to the State of WA. You need to pull hour head out of you-know-where
I didn’t address Gov. Inslee at all. I merely noted that running against a Republican candidate is a very solid strategy for winning a statewide election here, and has remained so for two solid decades.